Naturally Horses

The Character of The Horse - If Horses Were at School 

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Would you recognise your horse at school?

Quarter Horses:  Definitely jocks. Strutting around flexing those muscles, showing off their hind quarters.  Not necessarily bright, but get passed on as they are responsible for all the trophies in the glass cases. 

Paints:  Quarter Horses with too much makeup on.  Think they're better than the Quarter Horses, because they're prettier.

Thoroughbreds:  Preppies.  They are athletes, never 'jocks'.  Monogrammed blankets, leather halters, Nike eventer shoes, the latest custom trailer and tack.

Connemaras:  Gorgeous chicks with sultry eyelashes, sexy curves, devil-may-care attitudes.  Not into studying or anything to do with geometry.  Great fun to be around, delightful sense of humour, and the world's best pranksters.  Can usually be found in the nearest pub, entertaining the masses.  Fast and easy.

Appaloosas:  Could only be the stoners.  They like to drop acid so they can watch their spots move.


Shetland Ponies:  Frightening, spiky hairdos, snotty attitude and any colour of the rainbow.  Gotta be punks, some even sport tattoos. 

Friesians:   Big, buff, and always in black, they are the biker clique.  Cigs hanging out of the corner of their mouths, dangerous glint in the eyes, daring anyone to cross their path. 

Morgans:  They're the nerdy teacher's pets, running around doing everything from the yearbook to decorating the gym and ratting on the bikers, stoners and jocks.  They have perpetual wedgies.

Drafts (all breeds):  No real clique, they're just the big guys who sit in the back of the room and fart a lot (and then laugh).  Who's going to stop them? 

Icelandics and Paso Finos:  They're the little squirrelly geeks who flit around a dance trying to fit in and fail miserably.  The kind who wear jeans from M&S.

Ahkle Tekl (Akle Takl? Ackle Tackle....!! Akhal Teke!!):  Foreign exchange student (s), and no one can spell their names either.

Hackney Ponies:  A breed this manic would have to be band geeks.  Marching along with their knees and heads held high..... even when going to the loo.

Warmbloods:  The school and university staff.  Looking down their noses with righteous indignation and disgust.  Secretly wishing they were having half as much fun.

Welsh Cobs:  Slightly overweight girls with chunky calves and fluffy hair who like to play hockey but who occasionally take their glasses off and look absolutely gorgeous!

Can you suggest any more?  If so, please e-mail us and we'll add them to this list.

These descriptions of the characters of different breeds of horse were passed to us in a much forwarded and messy e-mail without acknowledging the original author.  If they are someone's copyright, then we apologize but they do appear on many websites.

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